You might be a teacher if (funny)

You’ve ever said “Put that gum on your nose!” …outside of the classroom.

You can’t have children because there is no name you can think of that doesn’t give you high blood pressure.

You hand pieces of paper to your friends and make them spit out their gum in front of you.

Your voice is permanently set on high volume from attempting to be heard over students’ voices day after day.

You’re more strict with the kids at school than at home.

You correct a total stranger’s grammar errors.

When you go shopping and your kids spot a friend, the kid’s parents come over and say hi, and you don’t remember ever meeting them.

Any sustained loud noise causes you to impulsively flick the light switch on and off.

You send another adult to detention for using four-letter words in public … and they go.

You want to slap the next person who says, “Must be nice to have all your holidays and summers free.”

You cringe whenever someone says, “At least you give three months vacation.”

Or “I would love to get off work at 3.”

(Most) people allow you to tell their child what to do.

You have at least one piece of jewelry that lights up.

Your own children have to raise their hands to capture your attention.

You can tell it’s a full moon without ever looking outside.

When out in public, you feel the urge to talk to strange children and correct their behavior.

When you mention “vegetables,” you’re not talking about a food group.

Your personal life comes to a screeching halt at report card time.

You believe chocolate is a food group.

~author unknown

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